My daughter JJ request if she could cut she doll’s hair. In the next break-up second, these were the thoughts that ran despite my head.

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On one hand I wanted to keep her doll spring ‘nice’.

I was pertained to that the human who had recently offered her the doll would certainly be offended.

I worried the JJ would certainly feel a feeling of remorse when she wasn’t able to undo what she had actually done.

I want to instil in her a feeling of treatment for she belongings.

I fretted the she may not favor the results, and the doll would be considered ‘ugly’ and also no much longer played with.


On the other hand, I wanted JJ to feeling empowered to treatment for and also make decisions because that her very own toys.

I wanted to impress on my daughter that i felt that female watch aren’t everything: the appearance is just one facet of a person; the being clever, funny and kind are attributes that are simply as (or more) important.

I wanted JJ to feel that her very own hairstyle choice is simply as valid together anyone else’s. I wanted to encourage the confidence for her dolls (and her) to be their own person, and make selections that might not follow in addition to the stereotype.

I want to provide her with an avenue come roleplay out scenarios that may worry her or the she may be facing.

JJ herself as quite short hair. That is really slow come grow, but whenever that does reach her shoulders, she always asks for it come be cut again. We’ve always commented just how funky her short hair looks, and also joked the her herbal hair looks just like Rapunzel’s (in Tangled) after ~ she’s had actually her hair cut.

So, do I want my daughter to think that ns think a doll with much longer hair is much more beautiful, or in which method ‘better’? Couldn’t a quick hair cut on a doll look funky too? Were i to say no, would I be placing also much focus on looking ~ a toy the she has actually multiples of, and can be quickly replaced if need be? Shouldn’t she have the ability to decide ~ above the hair format of her own doll? Shouldn’t she be able to cut she dolls’ hair so that they look just like hers?


When you look at it favor that, i couldn’t really see any type of justification in saying no. And so, I claimed yes. And also then as soon as she brought out the second doll, I claimed yes again. And also yes come the third. And also when she lugged out Rapunzel, I stated yes again.


I did attract two currently in the sand. Firstly, she wasn’t enabled to reduced her sister’s doll’s hair, and secondly she wasn’t enabled to cut her very own hair. (I described she can have she hair reduced anyway she wanted, yet she couldn’t cut it herself.)

Besides this, she was cost-free to cut any type of of her own dolls’ hair as much as she wished.

She invested the next half hour cutting, trimming, styling, and then cutting some more. We chatted away about this and that. JJ proudly showed off her dolls’ new hairstyles, and explained the they didn’t should worry about their hair falling end their challenge while they played anymore.

And thus her id in funky short hair was reaffirmed.


I would have been happy if ours days pat had finished there. But something a lit bit special happened next.

**To give you some background, Camp top quality (a children’s family members cancer charity organisation in Australia) had actually visited JJ’s preschool a few months ago, and had talked around how some kids and adults space sick through an illness called cancer; these world have to take special medication to do them fine again; and that medicine causes their hair to loss out. JJ had lots of questions around it at the time, but hadn’t really brought the subject up again since.**

As JJ began to collect up the discarded locks of dolls’ hair, she ran come fetch a little baby doll the didn’t have any kind of hair. She asked if we could use the cut hair to do a wig, due to the fact that this little doll has actually cancer and also has come take medicine that provides her hair loss out.


Oh sweet child, correctly of course! Mummy now needs to work out exactly how to make a teeny tiny wig, but of course!


And therefore this opened the door to chatting about cancer. JJ wondered if the cancer medication tastes bad. “I think it would taste like snails. Ewww!” she said. We made decision if we met anyone who had tasted it, we would certainly ask them. Us talked around how many wigs the actual Rapunzel’s lengthy hair can make. Us talked about how put on a wig might make someone feeling a bit much better if their hair feeling out and they hadn’t wanted it to, an especially if they space a mrs or a child. Us chatted about how not every human who is fully is ailing – some males are outright or cut their hair (like a few friends that ours). And we conserved the cut hair because that a future wig making project.

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This all happened a few weeks back now, and also I assumed it is exciting to keep in mind that JJ quiet plays with her (now funkier) dolls. Not necessarily every day, yet then she didn’t play with them everyday before either. She doesn’t view them as ‘ugly’, or ‘damaged’. She thinks they are awesome. She’s just asked if she can have a haircut as well, because she wants her hair to be nice and also short too. And so it doesn’t autumn into she eyes once she plays.