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← PreviousNext →“Kissing Boys provides You thrive Boobies!” or do It or break It 1×04, “Sunday, Bloody SashaSunday”

Oh, Make it or break It. After the ever-so-brief glimpse of an excellent last week, it’s reassuring to see you ago to your cheesy, cringeworthy, fully removed from fact self. If you preserved being good, i think my whole equilibrium would be thrown the end of whack. It’s choose if Old Faithful stopped erupting or something.

You are watching: Does sasha come back to the rock

Previously, ~ above Make the or break It: Sasha Belov concerns the gym and also everyone’s going to eat, sleep, breath gymnastics it rotates Nationals. You girl will have actually no life, so none the those boys and sexin’, friend hear? Kaylie and also Payson have asserted war on evil Lauren, when Emily functions her Sue-Fu top top yet an additional unsuspecting victim, a dude named Damon. Kaylie it s okay wasted turn off cheap beer in ~ a party, wherein Creepy Carter find her and throws a fit. Meanwhile, Lauren accuses Summer, she Dad’s Jesus-loving secretary/girlfriend, of gift a yellow digger. Because Lauren clearly craves the fist of dodgy men, she offers it as much as Creepy Carter and also then steals his phone.

That’s right, kids… tonight we’re see a really Special episode of Make the or break It. We’re kickin’ the ’80s format tonight, in what feels favor a cross in between the initial Degrassi junior High and the Breakfast Club. ~/ ~/

Oh yes, we’ve got a drinking video game now. Check out the rule here.

“The Church that Laurentology welcomes you!”

The episode opens in church, with Lauren sit in the pew sporting a somber next ponytail. The an initial words we hear are the sermon, in i beg your pardon the pastor speaks that guilt and the desire to it is in pure again. Y hello thar, anvillicious imagery. Quite to check out you again. Lauren surreptitiously gets out Carter’s cabinet phone and also reads Kaylie’s post for the millionth time. This is reminding me the a slightly more bizarre and also homoerotic version of that scene in Clueless in i m sorry Tai mirrors Cher her “Elton collection.” but at least Tai didn’t bring it everywhere with her and bust out her “Rollin’ through My Homies” tape come randomly gaze at in church. ~/

The sermon proceeds as we cut to Casa Cruz. A hungover Kaylie wakes up and also immediately checks her phone messages. Following we watch Creepy Carter in the shower, showing us the he’s not practically muscular sufficient to be believable as a gymnast. Ns mean, seriously. Have you viewed those guys? They space cut. and also might I mention what a fucked-up idea masculine producers have about (straight) female-directed fan service? Sure, the dudes (and lesbians) gain chicks in bikinis and underwear and tight clothes but what perform we get? Arvin Sloane stepping out of the shower, Dennis Franz’s ass, and also now this. Thanks, show. Thanks a lot.

Lauren walks out of church behind she Dad and Summer, who space holding hands. Awww. Summer’s attract this disconcertingly ugly pink-and-white dress, which has no bearing top top the plot however it to be bugging me so I had to share. Summer walks ahead to the pastor while Lauren and her Dad engage in a creepy convo about Dad and Summer’s sex life–or should I say lack thereof. Pa Tanner states that Summer go not think in premarital sex. Lauren’s like, ns can’t believe she’s a 30-year-old virgin.

~/ Summer introduce the pastor to Lauren and also her Dad. The goes on quite creepily about how Pa Tanner have to marry Summer prior to someone rather snatches she up. Yay, marriageable virgins because that sale! gain ’em if they’re hot! Lauren seems to be the only one that agrees v me on exactly how ridiculous this all is, since she gets a pair of an excellent digs in prior to she swans off. Her phone rings and she pulls the end a pink Blackberry. I’m a bit surprised. I would’ve believed Kaylie would be the one with a pink Blackberry. I’d number Lauren much more for other sleek and black and also expensive-looking. The phone of EVIL!

As Lauren answers, we cut to Emily at home, wearing her Pizza Shack shirt. She’s talking on a phone that looks favor something we owned in the 80s. Carry out they also sell phones prefer that anymore? We find out it’s Sasha calling all the main personalities in for practice. Emily’s Mom, who gets a most screentime in this ep and also whom I will certainly heretofore describe as Chloe (it is her name), wanders out in she usual skank wear and also is like, “But it’s Sunday! your day off!” ~/ Emily freaks out about missing her twin shift at Pizza Shack. Chloe offers to sweet-talk the boss, but Emily place the kibosh ~ above that appropriate quickly. Nobody must recognize she trains in ~ the Rock! Or else… i don’t know! however it’s really important!

“These plot twists are offering me a headache.”

Cut to Payson at the Rock through Kaylie. Payson’s sporting her usual style of mylar-balloon violet leo if Kaylie dons a important hideous strappy creation that looks choose Wilma Flintstone’s dress mated through a document shredder. ~/ ~/ Yes, I understand it’s a style from Nastia Liukin’s line, and this is why she’s a gymnast, no a fashion designer. Kaylie’s checking she phone yet again, and Payson advises her the they’ll be in problem if Sasha captures her. Kaylie complains about her hangover, but this is pretty lot the just time in the ep we’ll hear about it. I guess that went away as soon as the plot didn’t require it anymore.


~/ Payson and also Kaylie speculate over why they’re the only ones that got called in. Then Emily reflects up, and also Payson deduces the Sasha discovered out around the kegger. They scare for a moment until Lauren come (in a blue-and-green puke-colored leo, but yay French braids! ~/). This prompts groans from the others, yet Payson points out that her being right here is a an excellent thing. As much as Payson knows, Lauren didn’t walk to the party, for this reason Sasha can’t be onto them, right?

“Tonight we drink beer in hell!”

Wrong. Sasha to walk in and tosses them every beer cans. He proceeds come lecture them about how they’re claimed to be extraordinary, however apparently they’d fairly party and get wasted. Payson pleads the she never ever wanted to go to the party and only walk to keep her friends out of trouble. She walk a right an excellent job of that, i see. Sasha mocks her about playing chaperone and then move on to Emily, whom he mocks because that being a sheep. That’s the finest you have the right to do, Sasha? I’m disappointed. Lauren denies gift at the party yet Sasha find the telltale stamp on her wrist. I don’t recognize whether to be skeeved the Lauren apparently hasn’t showered because the party or dismayed that she is such a dumb ass the she didn’t also rinse the stamp off. Sasha endangers to go earlier to England but Payson begs him no to. I’m through her. Please, Sasha, don’t go. For this reason he stays and also yells about how they’re every on probation and also then he takes the beers back. Cool, deserve to I have actually them? Sasha then informs the girls the it’s not sufficient for them to say they’re sorry. They have to feel it. Sasha, you have the right to make me feeling it anytime.

“Are you threaten me??

Credits, i m sorry amuse me because they show a montage that our cast members and stunt doubles performing dramatic-looking move in the dark. Next scene opens up at Pizza Shack. Chloe comes running in and approaches the manager, a frazzled ginger chick who looks hyped-up on emphatamines. Sort of like Beavis in Beavis and Butt-head perform America. ~/ The manager tells Chloe the if Emily can’t do it, she requirements to discover someone to cover her shift or she’s fired. Reduced to Chloe in a Pizza Shack shirts yelling orders out in a strange hybrid of English and also bad Spanish. Damon mirrors up and also mistakes her for the boss, yet she corrects him and also says she’s Emily’s sister. Damon reveals that he’s spanning Razor and also Chloe’s like, for this reason you have actually no idea what you’re doing, either. Sounds choose the creating room on any type of given day. I’ve operated at restaurants before and also I have the right to tell you that if you require a shift covered, it needs to be by one more employee. Friend can’t just have actually some random untrained person come in. Otherwise the place might have a sue on their hands. Realism? The writers spit on your realism! Ptooey! Anyway, Chloe and also Damon continue to banter, and also I won’t bother recapping the dialogue–just imagine any cheesy 80s teenager B-movie.

Cut come Chez Keeler, wherein Payson’s Mom and Becca are residence alone. Becca wants to walk to a movie with a friend but Ma Keeler protests top top grounds that it’s “Family Day.” Becca points the end that her Dad’s at work and Payson’s at practice, so it’s not lot of a household day. They quibble because that a bit until Ma Keeler reluctantly relents. Becca, feeling guilty, asks her mother to go through them, however Ma Keeler passes. Every alone on household Day!

At Chez Cruz, Creepy Carter greets the maid that grouchily tells him Kaylie’s no here. Well, hell. Does anyone know about this however Sasha and also the Cruz ‘rents? Carter’s almost as stealth together Seth Cohen. ~/ Creepy Carter find Leo practicing putts on a little track on the ground, and also I’m reminded that the market on Buffy. ~/ Leo speak Creepy Carter the Kaylie loves him and also is sorry, however she’s not here due to the fact that Sasha called her in because that practice. Creepy Carter freaks out since Lauren’s also at practice. Leo wonders why he’s acquired his undies in a bunch, therefore Creepy Carter speak Leo the did something horrible and also unspeakable and also unforgivable and you’d think the like, fixed murdered anyone on this cast. Which actually seems choose an plot of mercy at this point.

“Do you girls mind? You’re distracting me from mine cross-stitch!”

On the dramatic note, we cut to commercial, and return to some developing shots that Boulder before settling top top the Rock. Sasha is sit on a folding chair chair, counting off and twiddling his thumbs. Meanwile, the girls are doing calisthenics and also bickering. Lauren accuses Payson the blabbing come Sasha and also calls Kaylie miss out on Goody two Shoes. OOOOOOOH SIQBURN! Lauren baits Kaylie by discussing that Creepy Carter was at the party, and Kaylie freezes. Sasha notices, proceeds to contact them every losers and tells them to start again. Have actually I ever before mentioned that ns love Sasha?

Well, i guess we know which one’s on the bottom.

Back come Creepy Carter and also Leo. Creepy Carter pour out his guts, and also in a fabulous display of bad acting, Leo asks, “Is there any type of reason ns shouldn’t smash your face in best now?” Maybe because you’re around as menacing together my grandmother, Leo? Sorry, grandma. Leo urges Creepy Carter no to call Kaylie since she will be devastated. What she doesn’t know can’t ache her. I’m appalled. What sort of a brother are you, Leo? So much for sibling loyalty! Creepy Carter claims he’s got to obtain to the Rock and also tell Kaylie prior to Lauren does. Leo provides a halfhearted effort at righteous anger and gives Carter a pansy ass punch in the gut. It come off around as fierce as if he’d poked the Pillsbury Doughboy in the stomach. Ryan Atwood would certainly be ashamed.

Over at the Rock, the girls are currently climbing ropes–well, type of. They type of move up and also down however mostly simply cling to the ropes a few yards over the mats. In mine gym, we had actually to climb approximately the top, touch the ceiling, and then climb ago down, rinse and also repeat together needed. However then, it’s harder to bicker around unattractive flat-faced men that way. Lauren keeps baiting Kaylie around Creepy Carter till Payson tells them come shut up. Emily asks what is up v Sasha… is the like, a sadist or something? No, that would certainly be the man who greenlighted this show in the first place. Pa Tanner shows up and also Lauren instantly runs up to him because that help. Dad blows her off, saying he’s right here to talk to Sasha about the Rock and not to bail she ass out. Pa Tanner and Sasha head for the office but prior to he goes, Sasha is sure to call Lauren that many thanks to her, the girls need to start again.

In the office, Pa Tanner go on around how he developed the Rock through his bare hands in the snow and also threw his blood, sweat, and also tears into it. OK, much more like his money. Sasha’s like, “Congratulations” and i just love his distribution here. It’s like, “Whatever, tool.” Pa Tanner appeals to Sasha to convince the board to reinstall him as president and manager, citing politics as the reason. That goes on about the other ‘rents’ agendas, together if his motives room all pure. Reduced to Lauren attempting to climb the rope outside, and it looks favor our girlfriend subtlety flew the coop again. Sasha randomly asks Pa Tanner if he’s close v Lauren and if she deserve to talk to him. Pa Tanner marvels what this has to do through the Rock, and also I’m a little skeeved out. Was Sasha member the the Babysitter’s society or what, because he seems means too invested in his clients’ lives. ~/ Sasha speak Pa Tanner he’ll sleep top top it, and the 2 of them head out. ~ above the way, Sasha tells the girls to carry out upper body work-related on the bars. Kaylie snarks that Sasha’s one coach Pa Tanner can’t buy, and Lauren proceeds to bait her about Creepy Carter.

Outside, Pa Tanner and Sasha proceed to interact in a challenge of who has actually the biggest cajones. Yeah, favor it’s any type of contest. As Pa Tanner drives off, Creepy Carter shows up. Sasha, garbage can and notepad in hand, desires to understand what the wants. Creepy Carter tries come worm is means into the Rock but Sasha shuts him down quickly. Creepy Carter, not to be deterred, dials Leo on a adjacent pay phone and also hits the up because that Pa Cruz’s keys to the Rock.

When Sasha reenters the gym, the gathers the girls around him because that a fun small ritual he likes to carry out from time come time. Does that involve sacrificial virgins? ‘Cause if so, I’m fear Lauren’s out. Sasha passes out notepads and also tells the girls to write down any resentments they have actually toward every other. Climate they’ll fold up their notes and burn them in the bin. The girls room reluctant at first but the mighty stare of Sasha compels them, and also they begin to write. After dropping your notes in the bin, Sasha fishes claimed notes out and announces he’ll check out them great first. Everyone’s like, “Oh, shit!” yet Sasha assures lock the note will remain anonymous. Therefore it’s like a real-life livejournal anon meme! Dra-ma!

As expected, the secrets focus on each girl’s one personality trait. Payson complains around how no one works as tough as she go or recognizes the she’s better than the remainder of them. Kaylie whinges about Lauren’s betrayal and around Creepy Carter, whom she’s completely not seeing, girlfriend guys. Lauren go on about how no one took her part against miss out on Trailer Trash, who has actually no an approach and consistency and also will tank at Nationals exclamation point! Wait, did I create that note? everyone glares in ~ Lauren and she’s like, “Well, it’s true!” I understand it is, Lauren, and also this is why i love you. Finally, Emily whines about how no one has made her feel welcome in ~ the Rock. I would favor to know what she expects. Human being to swoon end her and to market to create a attribute on her in their school paper? ~/ (Oh sad, sad day as soon as I’d fairly be watching Twilight.) Bitch should’ve moved to Forks.

With that fun out that the way, Sasha burns the notes and also announces that today’s conditioning is over. However, lock girls room not cost-free to go–now they’re going come clean every the mats. Emily tries to obtain out of it, prompting everyone other than Payson come follow her lead. But Sasha won’t hear any of it. He makes them surrender their cell phones, back Kaylie make the efforts frantically to inspect her voicemail first. Emily has actually no cell phone. Ns weep for her. When Lauren and Kaylie continue to bicker around Carter, Sasha heads the end saying he’ll inspect on them occasionally. Ns love Sasha, but what a dumb ass. Prefer you really leaving a bunch of teenagers alone and also trust that they’ll execute what they’re told? Hasn’t he ever watched like, any teen display ever?

More bickering over the confessions. Kaylie continues to deny dating Creepy Carter and Lauren delivers one more awesome line: “Sasha’s no stupid like Marty.” Girl can be a bitch but she speaks truth. Payson make the efforts to regain order but gets sucked into the dispute too. Climate Emily brings the scene to the whine-tastic orgasm with a gem that have the right to basically be synthetic up as, “BAWWWW YOU’RE well-off BAWWWW I have to WORK in ~ PIZZA SHACK BAWWWW I’M bad BAWWWWW feeling SORRY for ME!” anyone shuts up and also listens, the course. Even the mighty Lauren is powerless against the mar Sue.

Cut come the Pizza Shack. Chloe and also Damon proceed to banter, and it’s a actual testament to how insufferable anyone else is the I’m in reality glad to it is in watching this two. Damon asks Chloe where she acquired her madd Spanish Skillz (which largely consist of scattered Spanish words and English ones with an -o attached to the end), and also she runs under the list of charmingly blue-collar jobs she’s worked. Damon desires to understand what brought them to Boulder, and Chloe tells him it’s therefore Emily deserve to train in ~ the Rock. She might go come the Olympics, girlfriend guys! v a twin tuck bar dismount and Tsuk tuck! Chloe realizes belatedly that it’s all claimed to it is in a large secret. Damon, speaking for the rest of us, casually asks why. Chloe talks about how Emily is this “private” person, as opposed come Chloe, that is the open-book type. Emily simply wants to be whatever her mother is not. Seeing as Chloe’s fun, likeable, sympathetic, and also a kind actor, I’d say mission accomplished. The manager come in and scolds Chloe and also Damon, and also Chloe tells she to acquire some manners. Gee, i wonder why Chloe can’t hold a job. Yeah, the manager’s a pain however you don’t just talk earlier to them unless you want to obtain fired. The manager leaves and Damon renders a crack around her being a meth head. I’m thinking the just meth below is going around the writers’ room.

Back in ~ the Rock, the girls are scrubbing the mats and also complaining. Payson cautions Emily that she could get kicked out for functioning part-time. Lauren asks if she’ll really obtain fired if she doesn’t present up, and also Emily condescendingly delivers a winner of a line: “That’s how it works in the actual word.” Which trust me, has zero bearing on this show. Kaylie points out that she and Payson invited Emily come places, yet Emily simply counters the they completely dissed her once she acquired here this morning. How? due to the fact that they didn’t pat fanfare and roll the end a review carpet? “OH YAY EMILY’S HERE! now THE PARTY can START!” Payson points out that she’s not precisely accessable, what with the mopey ~mystery woman~ act and also once again Payson brings the just semblance that logic. I might have come ordain she a priestess in the Church that Laurentology. Emily keeps whining about the Pizza Shack till Kaylie uses to cover for her. Kaylie claims she owes Emily one after she covered for her and also Carter, yet I personally think she was just sick of hear her. Lauren and Payson aren’t top top board with this, however Kaylie gives an inspiring Speech around how they all need to support each other in and exterior the gym. Payson and Lauren are accordingly shamed and agree to assist Emily.

They try to figure out how to acquire Emily the end unbeknownst come Sasha, but the only method out to prevent detection is the end the window. Castle wonder how Emily will get up there and also Lauren is amazing again once she says, “Well, if she’s for this reason great, why doesn’t she vault up there?” Seriously, she and Payson get the best lines. Kaylie offers her a dirty look and Lauren’s choose “Kidding!” but you can entirely tell she totally wasn’t. They obtain the idea to have Emily climb the rope approximately the window and shimmy outside, prefer Tarzan. ~/

Peppy popular music music plays together the girls aid Emily climb out the home window while Payson keeps watch. They are almost busted as soon as Sasha go in yet of food they aren’t, due to the fact that heaven forbid Emily Sue acquire fired from the Pizza Shack. How else will they move the whole Leo/Damon/Razor/Emily love rhombus? The rather tell Sasha the Emily’s in the bathroom and also he completely buys it, regardless of the fact that their delivery is as convincing as their gymnastic stunt work. Sasha leaves, and now lock argue around the consequences of getting caught covering because that Emily. Payson groans that she’s walking to acquire an ulcer. It’s OK, Payson, I have the right to relate.

Ma Keeler come to pick up Payson, and discovers the Sasha’s life in a trailer exterior the gym. No, ns did no make the up. Sasha speak Ma Keeler the it’ll be a couple of hours since the girls are cleaning the mats. Ma Keeler lectures Sasha about how Sunday is the just day the girls have time to invest with your familes, and also today is their family members day! Sasha invites she to have a seat at his beloved picnic table, and offers her the job of regulating the gym. Wow, ns guess he was yes, really impressed by family members Day. Ma Keeler says she’ll sleep ~ above it.

Back at Pizza Shack, Chloe and Damon room still talking around Emily. We view that Chloe’s wearing she usual stripper shoes. I feel the need to mention that nobody of the restaurants I worked for allowed open-toed shoes. It’s a wellness risk. Furthermore, anyone pretty much wore sneakers or to run shoes, due to the fact that you’re on her feet because that hours and they will certainly die in heels. “BUT IT’S simply A SHOOOWWWWW! GTFO v YOUR REALISM!”


Chloe asks Damon how Razor feels about him invading his territory. For this reason is Razor like, King of the Shack the way Hodgins is King the the Lab? ~/ ~/ Damon’s like, it’s not prefer Razor’s Emily’s boyfriend. Chloe’s like, “I wish.” you might adjust your mind if you uncovered out that Razor obtained Damon come stalk Emily in his stead, Chloe. Chloe confides the Emily’s never had actually a boyfriend and Chloe doesn’t think she’s even been kissed! What is Emily, 16? attracted Barrymore deserve to beat that. ~/

Just then, who need to walk in but–SMASH CUT!–Emily! Damon tells Emily her mom is awesome. Ns agree. Yet rather 보다 thanking Chloe for covering for her, Emily’s pissed since Chloe might–gaspshock!–tell Damon stuff about her! Man, what one ungrateful bitch. She Mom simply saved she ass! I’m really beginning to feeling sorry for Chloe.

Back come Creepy Carter stand on a suburban street. Leo pulls up in his Porsche and hands end the secrets to the Rock. He alerts Creepy Carter around the after-effects of gaining caught, but Carter’s creepery will certainly not it is in foiled! “Bring the on!” the says. Give thanks to you, Creepy Carter, for reminding me of yet an additional movie I’d quite be watching. ~/

Back in ~ the Rock, Lauren speculates ~ above what other keys “Playground Prodigy” has. Haha, she’s prefer Sawyer through the nicknames. ~/ I want to speculate on Emily’s deep dark sekrits! EMILY eliminated HER FATHER! SHE go out UP HIS HOUSE and DROVE off ON A MOTORCYCLE! ~/ that actually… renders a most sense. Payson declares that she herself has no secrets, i beg your pardon segues into one of the most uncomfortable “girl talk” convos that this entire show. Possibly of all of TV. It also beats the end Troi and also Crusher’s boob convo in Star Trek: Insurrection. ~/ therefore Lauren announces that she has actually a secret… she’s not a virgin anymore!

Not a Virgin – Poe

Kaylie pounces ~ above that favor Porthos top top a part of cheese. ~/ (I dislike you, show, because that making me evaluate Enterprise). Lauren states it to be at the party but lies around her deflower-er. She says she didn’t know the guy and doesn’t mental his name. Payson is appalled and gasps, “How could you?” OMG, a one-night-stand! Lauren is a terrible PERSON! I’m clutching my pearls. Lauren excuses she hobaggery speak she simply wanted to it is in like various other girls she age. Payson objects, saying that “Not all girls our age are having actually sex! and we’re no like various other girls!” Lauren counters the they at least have boyfriends, as though own a friend is the barometer of normalcy. And also what around the non-gymnasts who are single? room they all freaks? give thanks to you, alphabet Family, because that teaming up v Stephenie Meyer in the search to take it feminism earlier another fifty years.

Lauren go on about how she has actually nothing in her life but gymnastics and also a Dad who desires to replace her with his gold-digging secretary, and holay creepy! Seriously, carry out these writers even think as soon as they write this stuff? The part of me that still holds ~ above a fragile if persistent faith in mankind wants to believe they do it on purpose and also are completely chortling afterwards, yet the dominant component is way too cynical for that–I mean, this network airs Secret Life. Payson’s like, “I can’t believe you had actually sex!” i can’t think anyone affiliated in this have the right to keep a straight face! Lauren speak Payson not to feel sorry for her, and also she’s happy she go it. Creepy Carter can be a creeper, however I assumption: v the sex was maja. WARNING: attach is NSFW

And if the wasn’t bizarre enough, Payson delivers the line of the evening: “Aren’t you afraid that having sex will certainly stimulate her hormones or something? You might get… large boobs or large hips! It’s death to gymnastics!” i guess Alicia Sacramone never acquired the memo. Ns might likewise mention that this line could sound a lot much more convincing if it did not come from an actress with much more T&A than fifty percent of Hollywood’s young starlets. Lauren demonstrates exactly how the creating room parties choose it’s 1998 by stating that doing the wild mattress dance will not give you titties favor Pamela Anderson or a booty like J-Lo. Payson declares she’s not having sex till she has actually a gold medal and also maybe not even after that. Well, Payson, if that’s how you desire to play it, ns hear there’s a lot of sexin’ walk on in the Olympic Village.

She goes on come lecture everyone that they have actually their entire lives to have sex and only one shot at the Olympics. Payson and Kaylie aren’t about to punch it top top boyfriends. Nah… as well easy. The prompts Kaylie come confess around Creepy Carter. I think Payson’s head is exploding. This prompts much more Creepy Carter-induced saying until Payson breaks in. She lectures everyone around their bitch drama and also backstabbing, however this time I actually feel because that Payson due to the fact that her worry is about their friendship fairly than Emily “IT’S ALL around MEEEEEEE!” Kmetko. The girls tearfully apologize and also I wait for them to do trust exercises turn off the mat. “Lauren, i don’t dislike you due to the fact that you’re a backstabbing bitch. You’re a backstabbing bitch because I hate you.” ~/ castle kiss and make up and also all obtain into a entirely cliché water fight just as Creepy Carter walks in.

Kaylie runs up to him and sucks his face off in prior of everyone, telling him glowingly the everyone knows. Lauren records Creepy Carter’s eye and shakes her head, for this reason he doesn’t call Kaylie. Kaylie and also Creepy Carter do out but Payson warns them to placed a lid ~ above it before she projectile vomits anywhere the carpet they simply cleaned. Oh wait, the was me. Payson is just afraid Sasha will catch them. Lauren has to turn away from the happy couple, due to the fact that she simply can’t be afflicted with it. You and me both, Lo.

Back to the Pizza Shack. Damon wants to know who the genuine Emily Kmetko is. She gets pissy and also he asks if she’s constantly been together a snob. I like this guy. Emily speak him about the 174907432421 places she’s lived since her mommy likes “fresh starts.” that asks around her father and she offers a noncommittal answer–“not in the picture.” She claims he’s not a “stick-around” man but few men are, citing “observation based upon experience.” ns think we’re an alleged to infer this originates from Chloe’s failure relationships, however I prefer to think there’s a dark chapter in Emily’s past. Probably some dude left she ~brokenhearted.~ probably she’s a lesbian! that would define why she hasn’t been specifically excited about her lot of love interests and also why she’s for this reason obsessed through privacy. Hmmmmm.

Emily deflects the convo to Damon, who says he wants to head out to LA to it is in a absent star. Ns love how everyone ~ above this show is a complete cliché. Damon suspects that Emily likes gift an outsider, because otherwise the would median exposing that she ~really~ is. The adds that it need to be hard being one outsider if she’s part of a team–the Rock. Em deduces that her mom blabbed, however Damon tells she to offer her mom a break. She’s simply proud the her, and also he’s the fort Knox the secrets. I need to say that Damon is by far the most exciting of Emily’s love interests. At least he challenges her rather of simply rambling about how hot and also special she is. I’m sure this will certainly turn about next week however you recognize me and the few fleeting an excellent moments in this show–I reap them while they last.

Emily wants to bail the end of Pizza Shack, and also Damon provides to sheathe for she if she walk a was standing tuck. Yaaayyyy more bad Emily stunt work! simply what we should make this episode complete. We gain some badly dubbed-in “ooohs” and applause. Damon is impressed. At least one of united state is. Emily says he need to see her standing complete twist. No, you re welcome don’t present it come us. Haven’t we endured enough? Emily asks Damon if her mom told him any much more embarrassing secrets and also he assures she she didn’t. An ext banter, and also the step mercifully ends.

Cut come the Rock, whereby we watch that the rope is tho hanging external the window. Sasha come in and asks whereby Emily is. The various other girls are totally silent and also panicking yet wouldn’t ya know, Emily comes to run over and also bails their asses out. Nice just how she sneaks back in precise behind Sasha’s back whilst make no noise whatsoever. Mar Sues have soopah powahs! Sasha speechifies around lighting candles and thank Heathus this ep is almost over. The girls all hug the out, bitches, then get into this large water fight and also make a huge mess the the location they just cleaned. I love just how writers of poor TV shows and also movies seem to understand of no other way to show characters laughing and also having fun than by making them acquire in huge messy fights. Ns guess it’s no a genuine friendship till you’ve dumped manky mop water all over your BFF.

Everyone’s all happy and huggy and smiley as they walk out of the gym. Ma Keeler choose Payson up and asks just how she would certainly feel if Ma Keeler started regulating the Rock. Payson laughs, reasoning she’s joking. Chloe pulls up and also Emily lastly thanks she for pour it until it is full in in ~ the Pizza Shack. Chloe talks about how cute Damon is and also gets a small too excited. Emily, as usual, shows no overwhelming reaction one way or another–like or dislike. Emily, this is law nothing come dispel my lesbian theory. Emily asks what else Chloe told Damon and Chloe insists she stated nothing.

“Oh, and also you’d best get to a clinic short article haste prior to the itching and swelling and also burning start up. Yet don’t worry–there’s one ointment that’ll clear it all up!”

Meanwhile, Lauren’s left standing over there alone, all woebegone. Over at Sasha’s trailer, Pa Tanner is quiet quibbling through Sasha about managing the Rock, yet Sasha blows him off. Creepy Carter, tho creeping around, comes approximately Lauren and also apologizes for hitting it and quitting it. The takes full responsibility. Ns guess it was his attempt to be gentlemanly however sorry, you’re quiet a creepy sleaze. Lauren simply smiles sadly and says it’s OK, it wasn’t her an initial time. Creepy Carter many thanks Lauren for not informing Kaylie about them, and also Lauren assures him that she walk it because that Kaylie, no him. Ns don’t see just how she’s law Kaylie any type of favors. An initial off, Creepy Carter’s spent most of his screentime gift a pushy, borderline stalkerish control freak. Kaylie’s better off without him. Secondly, if Carter’s going to operation out and also get wasted and also bang the first chick who’s ready whenever they have a fight, who’s to say he won’t execute it again? What a catch. Creepy Carter asks Lauren if she knows where his phone went, and also she feigns ignorance. When he’s gone, though, she traction it out again and gazes angstily at a picture of Kaylie and Carter. OK, is Lauren paging Glenn close or what because it is getting really Fatal Attraction increase in here. I can’t decide who’s creepier. Lauren gets right into her Dad’s Hummer and also the journey off, Lauren gazing sadly out the home window as a heart-wrenching pop ballad plays.

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And thus endeth tonight’s very Special Episode. This is one of those times once (I seem come say this often about this show) i think they to be trying to deal with actual issues faced by elite gymnasts yet as usual, fell method short of the mark. Yes, I obtain that this girls are an extremely sheltered and probably have less knowledge and also experience 보다 the typical teen. However the creators it seems to be ~ to have forgotten that their audience doesn’t. This episode would certainly be best at home if that aired in 1985, yet in 2009, you’re walking to have to do an ext than pontificate about very first kisses and also loss of virginity via girl talk that reads favor something the end of one of the YA publications I snark here. Remember, your viewers space the same kids that tune in to Gossip Girl and the new 90210 and various MTV reality shows in which teens drink, smoke, party, and swap boyfriends together casually and also often as most of us readjust our socks. I’m not saying this display should become Skins with gymnastics. However if you’re walk to have a an extremely Special Episode about sex at the very least treat the in a method that feels new or current, and not favor you recycled a rubbish Afterschool special script.

That said, from the preview that looks like following week’s walk to be a genuine doozy. Mother-daughter fashion show! ns can already feel the America’s next Top Model jokes flowing from mine fingertips onto the keyboard! Until next week–and mental kids, don’t have actually sex! Or you might end up looking like this: